(Warning: If you are already in a bad mood, don’t read this. It is rather confusing….)
To live a good life, Change is essential. - Quote by Me…
In the last few days I have met two of my old friends. When I say ‘friend’, I mean it. Otherwise I am astute enough to classify people into ‘having acquaintance with’, ‘colleague’, ‘just known’ and ‘friend’ etc. Both of them are my ‘friends’ according to my definition. To both of them I accidentally met after a considerable gap.
After a chat for few minutes, X said, “Oh, you have not at all changed!”…. I smiled and responded by saying, “But some part of me is completely changed”… My friend smiled but did not accept my statement.
In the similar situation, Y reacted, “You have completely become another person. I would not have recognized you. I feel like I am meeting a stranger”. …. On this too, I smiled and tried to assure him by saying, “Oh, some part of me is not at all changed…. I am the same person…”
I won’t ascribe the change in their responses to their gender. Friends are friends first and forever…. whether the friend is a man or a woman hardly makes a difference. May be they saw me in different situations or responses. They were not talking about physiological change (as that is unavoidable) but subtler change in me.
There is no contradiction when I say that I have changed and I have not changed. The statements actually complement each other… because nothing can change completely but at the same time nothing can remain the same forever.
What happens? There are four possibilities:
a. situation changes, response remains the same
b. situation changes, response changes
c. situation remains the same, response changes
d. situation remains the same, response remains the same
Above these, there could be two overarching facts: one is to be aware of these, another is not being aware…. And each of these gives rise to either a new situation or a new response or both…
When I review my life objectively (is it really possible?), I find that I have all these four elements. Sometimes trying to change a situation itself is a response, but the ‘situation’ is not completely under one’s control. Sometimes ‘not at all responding’ too is a kind of response.
If our responses do not change, life will become a big bore. If the situation does not change, then too life will become boring. So, it is good that things around keep on changing. In the process, I lost some precious things, but I gained much more too…. Sometimes it hurts when I come across response different than what I expect, but that too in inevitable. I too haven’t pleased each and everyone around me. I gave pain and I have my share of pain.
What triggers change in my response? Experiences, increase or decrease in capabilities, exposure, change in values and perspective….
What factors are responsible for my steadfast response? Dunno.
Sometimes the Change brings back me to the original positions, questioning the whole journey
To Exit, to completely withdraw from something is the biggest and mostly irreversible change. But do we ever be able to experience it? When I withdraw from one arena, I enter into other.
I cannot eliminate factor C…. actually that has been the backbone of my life so far.
Sunday, February 15, 2009
Sunday, February 8, 2009
26. Half an hour with Masarabai
Our interaction started with her shout. As part of on-field facilitation, I do visit work areas of my organization. Today my colleagues had planned a visit to tribal area in Nandurbar district in Maharashtra. We were on the farm, there was discussion regarding horticulture plantation and intercrops. I was taking a snap and the woman shouted at me, “Why are you taking my photograph without telling me first?”
I was meeting her for the first time. She spoke in her mother tongue Mavachi, which I follow in bits and pieces. There were six people with us, all men. There was a sudden stress and tension in the environment. The men started talking angrily to the woman. I requested them to say nothing, said ‘sorry’ to the woman and explained that as her farm was good, I was taking a photograph.
She said, “You don’t understand my language. Do you?”
I replied, “Very little’’
She proudly said, “You people go to school and still do not understand our language. I never went to school, but I can understand your language (Marathi)”. I smiled at her sharp remark.
She dragged me towards the small hut in the corner of the farm. From the midst of lot of things, she pulled out a bright green piece of cloth, covered her shoulder and head with that cloth and ordered me, “Now take a photograph”.
I followed her order. I showed the snap on my digicam to her and asked, “Is it good? Are you happy now?” She smiled like a child. She instructed me, “Publish it”.
Publish it? Where? I was confused.
But the woman was clearly enjoying her moment. She simply said, “Oh! Publish it in a (news) paper…” (I am not influential enough to publish this photo in a newspaper, so I am publishing it on my blog. )
Now Masarabai (this is her name) was extremely happy with me. She started chatting with me. A woman of 40, with married son and daughter, holding a small farm, working hard with her husband, illiterate had suddenly lot of things to share with me. As she was aware of my lack of knowledge of her language, after every three sentences she was asking, “Do you follow what I am saying?” After two three ‘Yes’ from me, she again ordered me, “If you don’t understand what I say, you should ask these men. They know both the languages”. I was enjoying the domination of this smart witted woman.
She asked my colleagues to take me to her home (a few kilometers away) and offer me tea. “But who will prepare tea?” I asked. Masarabai had simple answers to all my questions – “My daughter in law will.” Then she turned to my colleague and told him in a matter of fact tone, “If she is not there, you prepare a tea and give it to madam”. We all laughed and somehow convinced her by saying that next time I will have food at her house.
We were discussing the cash flow of the family – annual income and expenditure and how they mange the loss. Masarabai was listing various expenses, when her neighbor remarked, “Tell Madam, how much you spend on alcohol’’.
Masarabai was silent for a moment. Then she turned to me and asked, “Don’t you drink (alcohol)?” I said, “No, I don’t”. “Why?” was her next question. I suddenly found the question very difficult. “That is not the tradition of my community”, I tried to answer sensitively.
“Do you eat meat?” Masarabi asked. “Do you like meat?” I tried to bypass her question. Masarabai answered, “Yes, I like meat very much. I like chicken too. Have you tested it?”
My colleagues and the community men were getting upset at the conversation. But I thought if I can ask personal questions to Masarabai, she has every right to ask similar questions to me. I also sensed that by asking these various questions, she was trying to relate me with her life, her situation. She was assessing me in her own way, and she was deciding whether I was trustworthy or not.
I said, “No, I do not like meat and chicken. But next time when I come to your home, if you cook meat or chicken, I will eat it.”
She disapproved my polite statement. “If you don’t like something, you should not do it just to please someone, not things like eating meat and chicken ……”
Masarabai was silent for couple of minutes. Then she declared, “Ok, I will give up alcohol. But I like meat and chicken and I will eat more of it.” We all laughed happily. “Is it ok Madam?” she wanted my assurance.
Whether Masarabai will really give up alcohol or not, only time will tell. But I am amazed at the strong character of this tribal woman. Her thinking process is very clear and she is ready to accommodate strange ways of life (of others). She is assertive, rational, humorous, emotional, and sensitive. She has strong likes and dislikes, but she is not forcing others to accept those as the only desirable ways of living. She is ready to change.
By interacting with Masarabai, I feel enlightened and more empowered.
I was meeting her for the first time. She spoke in her mother tongue Mavachi, which I follow in bits and pieces. There were six people with us, all men. There was a sudden stress and tension in the environment. The men started talking angrily to the woman. I requested them to say nothing, said ‘sorry’ to the woman and explained that as her farm was good, I was taking a photograph.
She said, “You don’t understand my language. Do you?”
I replied, “Very little’’
She proudly said, “You people go to school and still do not understand our language. I never went to school, but I can understand your language (Marathi)”. I smiled at her sharp remark.
She dragged me towards the small hut in the corner of the farm. From the midst of lot of things, she pulled out a bright green piece of cloth, covered her shoulder and head with that cloth and ordered me, “Now take a photograph”.
I followed her order. I showed the snap on my digicam to her and asked, “Is it good? Are you happy now?” She smiled like a child. She instructed me, “Publish it”.
Publish it? Where? I was confused.
But the woman was clearly enjoying her moment. She simply said, “Oh! Publish it in a (news) paper…” (I am not influential enough to publish this photo in a newspaper, so I am publishing it on my blog. )
Now Masarabai (this is her name) was extremely happy with me. She started chatting with me. A woman of 40, with married son and daughter, holding a small farm, working hard with her husband, illiterate had suddenly lot of things to share with me. As she was aware of my lack of knowledge of her language, after every three sentences she was asking, “Do you follow what I am saying?” After two three ‘Yes’ from me, she again ordered me, “If you don’t understand what I say, you should ask these men. They know both the languages”. I was enjoying the domination of this smart witted woman.
She asked my colleagues to take me to her home (a few kilometers away) and offer me tea. “But who will prepare tea?” I asked. Masarabai had simple answers to all my questions – “My daughter in law will.” Then she turned to my colleague and told him in a matter of fact tone, “If she is not there, you prepare a tea and give it to madam”. We all laughed and somehow convinced her by saying that next time I will have food at her house.
We were discussing the cash flow of the family – annual income and expenditure and how they mange the loss. Masarabai was listing various expenses, when her neighbor remarked, “Tell Madam, how much you spend on alcohol’’.
Masarabai was silent for a moment. Then she turned to me and asked, “Don’t you drink (alcohol)?” I said, “No, I don’t”. “Why?” was her next question. I suddenly found the question very difficult. “That is not the tradition of my community”, I tried to answer sensitively.
“Do you eat meat?” Masarabi asked. “Do you like meat?” I tried to bypass her question. Masarabai answered, “Yes, I like meat very much. I like chicken too. Have you tested it?”
My colleagues and the community men were getting upset at the conversation. But I thought if I can ask personal questions to Masarabai, she has every right to ask similar questions to me. I also sensed that by asking these various questions, she was trying to relate me with her life, her situation. She was assessing me in her own way, and she was deciding whether I was trustworthy or not.
I said, “No, I do not like meat and chicken. But next time when I come to your home, if you cook meat or chicken, I will eat it.”
She disapproved my polite statement. “If you don’t like something, you should not do it just to please someone, not things like eating meat and chicken ……”
Masarabai was silent for couple of minutes. Then she declared, “Ok, I will give up alcohol. But I like meat and chicken and I will eat more of it.” We all laughed happily. “Is it ok Madam?” she wanted my assurance.
Whether Masarabai will really give up alcohol or not, only time will tell. But I am amazed at the strong character of this tribal woman. Her thinking process is very clear and she is ready to accommodate strange ways of life (of others). She is assertive, rational, humorous, emotional, and sensitive. She has strong likes and dislikes, but she is not forcing others to accept those as the only desirable ways of living. She is ready to change.
By interacting with Masarabai, I feel enlightened and more empowered.
Sunday, February 1, 2009
25. The Shaving of Shagpat
Just about 24 hours ago if someone would have asked me what ‘The Shaving of Shagpat' means, I would have probably shrugged shoulders and pleaded ignorance. But not now. I am enchanted by the efforts of Shibli Bagrag, Noorna bin Noorka, unfortunate Bhanvar the Beautiful, Sword of Aklis... everything that George Meredith wrote.
No, yesterday I did not know anything about George Meredith either. I went to a book shop with a colleague; saw a book written by one of my most favorite Marathi authors Mr. G A Kulkarni. GA (as he is popularly known) was a fantastic writer and one of the best translators. I have read almost all his books. Presently I have none of his books in my collection. I was planning to purchase one GA book. So, I grabbed it.
This particular book I have purchased is a translation of ‘The Shaving of Shagpat’ by George Meredith, which was published in 1856. It always amazes me when I read books from earlier period. So much has happened before I was born, and so much more will keep on happening after my death… and still I cling to this life as if nothing else is important in this world….
Shibli the hero of the story is a barber…. very interesting. One Astrologer had told at Shibli’s birth that the child is destined for great things. Shibli keeps on wandering in search of that opportunity to enact the ‘great task’. Here George Meredith says, “a wandering person has a wandering mind, it cannot have peace”. I have been wandering for many years. Frankly speaking, I was shaken by that statement as if struck by lightning. It opened many doors within me.
Funnily, the whole efforts of Shibli and Noorna are directed towards shaving Shagpat, whose long and wild hair have some magical power. That’s right! Many times Power is more of a myth cleverly created by the powerful. Power comes through heredity, through seniority, through better education, through a particular religion… … then why not through uncut hair? George Meredith is sarcastic at his best here. And the idea that a common man like Shibli can challenge the existing authority is also interesting.
The book is an ‘Arabian Entertainment’. It is about magic … good and evil both. It is about greed and shattered dreams. It is about loneliness and it is about myth of power. It is about cooperation and humility. It is about love and distractions. It is about simplicity and ambition. It is about determination and direction. It is about learning while doing. It is about efforts and it is about destiny. The main statement is that the destiny drives human being in a particular direction, to a specific end. If you cooperate with your destiny, your journey is made easier (with different gifts approaching you), if you don’t you have to carry the burden of your sorrow. (I remembered the shloka from Bhagvadgeeta – ‘swadharme nidhanam shreyah, paradharmo bhayavahah’)
There are stories within the story and poems have been used very appropriately. The story of ‘Bhanvar the Beautiful’ is absorbing. For a moment, she wishes for a precious jewel… and what price she pays for that one moment of lust! Life and Death are woven together … and the complicated relationships made me wonder about my own existence. For some time, I could feel that everything around me is unreal … and reality evolved through that solid unreality around me.
If you are a complete adult, without any trace of child in you, you will definitely question the logic of the story. But if there is a child in you, (does not matter if it is latent), you will enjoy the book. It completely takes you to other world and slowly brings you back to your own world. In real life there is no Sword of Aklis and no drop of water can make all things around speak……
One realizes that even with all these magical wonders; life is a combination of happiness and sorrow. It is up to us, what we choose and how we live. George Meredith highlights this age-old truth meaningfully and artistically. Thanks to GA, otherwise I may never have read this great story.
Please, read this book. You can find digital version at any search engine. I found it easily on Google.
If you want Marathi translation by GA, you can have my copy.
No, yesterday I did not know anything about George Meredith either. I went to a book shop with a colleague; saw a book written by one of my most favorite Marathi authors Mr. G A Kulkarni. GA (as he is popularly known) was a fantastic writer and one of the best translators. I have read almost all his books. Presently I have none of his books in my collection. I was planning to purchase one GA book. So, I grabbed it.
This particular book I have purchased is a translation of ‘The Shaving of Shagpat’ by George Meredith, which was published in 1856. It always amazes me when I read books from earlier period. So much has happened before I was born, and so much more will keep on happening after my death… and still I cling to this life as if nothing else is important in this world….
Shibli the hero of the story is a barber…. very interesting. One Astrologer had told at Shibli’s birth that the child is destined for great things. Shibli keeps on wandering in search of that opportunity to enact the ‘great task’. Here George Meredith says, “a wandering person has a wandering mind, it cannot have peace”. I have been wandering for many years. Frankly speaking, I was shaken by that statement as if struck by lightning. It opened many doors within me.
Funnily, the whole efforts of Shibli and Noorna are directed towards shaving Shagpat, whose long and wild hair have some magical power. That’s right! Many times Power is more of a myth cleverly created by the powerful. Power comes through heredity, through seniority, through better education, through a particular religion… … then why not through uncut hair? George Meredith is sarcastic at his best here. And the idea that a common man like Shibli can challenge the existing authority is also interesting.
The book is an ‘Arabian Entertainment’. It is about magic … good and evil both. It is about greed and shattered dreams. It is about loneliness and it is about myth of power. It is about cooperation and humility. It is about love and distractions. It is about simplicity and ambition. It is about determination and direction. It is about learning while doing. It is about efforts and it is about destiny. The main statement is that the destiny drives human being in a particular direction, to a specific end. If you cooperate with your destiny, your journey is made easier (with different gifts approaching you), if you don’t you have to carry the burden of your sorrow. (I remembered the shloka from Bhagvadgeeta – ‘swadharme nidhanam shreyah, paradharmo bhayavahah’)
There are stories within the story and poems have been used very appropriately. The story of ‘Bhanvar the Beautiful’ is absorbing. For a moment, she wishes for a precious jewel… and what price she pays for that one moment of lust! Life and Death are woven together … and the complicated relationships made me wonder about my own existence. For some time, I could feel that everything around me is unreal … and reality evolved through that solid unreality around me.
If you are a complete adult, without any trace of child in you, you will definitely question the logic of the story. But if there is a child in you, (does not matter if it is latent), you will enjoy the book. It completely takes you to other world and slowly brings you back to your own world. In real life there is no Sword of Aklis and no drop of water can make all things around speak……
One realizes that even with all these magical wonders; life is a combination of happiness and sorrow. It is up to us, what we choose and how we live. George Meredith highlights this age-old truth meaningfully and artistically. Thanks to GA, otherwise I may never have read this great story.
Please, read this book. You can find digital version at any search engine. I found it easily on Google.
If you want Marathi translation by GA, you can have my copy.
Thursday, January 29, 2009
24. Add On
During lunch hour yesterday, the Postman came to my workplace in search of me. He had an envelope in his hand. ‘You never meet at home’, he complained... it was more of an icebreaker (should we use this term in the context of looming global warming?) than a complaint. “Oh, you can always hand it over the parcels to my neighbors”, I tried to clarify. He did not pay any attention to my statement.
It was an envelope from BSNL (Bharat Sanchar Nigam Limited – telephone service provider under control of Government of India.). I pay my telephone bills (both landline and mobile) through ECS (Electronic Clearing System) – I get the bill every month and the amount is directly paid through my bank account. Therefore, I was wondering what this envelop might contain.
To my surprise, there was a letter with a SIM card. This ‘Add on’ SIM is free and there will be no monthly fixed charges. The letter explains briefly the benefits of this ‘Absolutely Free’ facility. The BSNL has spent millions of rupees on dispatch of these SIM cards to its customers.
The problem is I do not need any additional SIM, nor did I ever ask for it. Why the BSNL just could not check it with me in advance? They keep on sending me innumerable SMS regarding this ring tone, that song and that scheme. Why nobody at BSNL thought of confirming the need before spending? After all its public money, they are spending and so they need not bother about such simple aspects of work.
BSNL is not completely at fault though. In the consumerist atmosphere, hardly anybody says ‘no’ to free things. People keep on collecting unwanted things just because they get it free – that only means they do not have to pay direct costs. Why one should keep ‘adding on’ things in life at the wish of others – is the aspect, which I have hardly ever understood.
Normally, I would go to BSNL office and return the SIM card. However, I know, there would be complicated procedure. The idea again is ‘keeping the SIM should be easier’ (saving time, money, energy, mental peace…..) than ‘rejecting this ‘add on’ SIM facility’. This is ridiculous. This may be aggressive marketing but it is irritating enough.
I am neither going to follow BSNL nor will I try to ‘teach them how to work better’. I have decided not to add on anything in life just because some service provider wrongly anticipated my needs. I will add on things if I wish, no one can compel me to do so. Definitely, impersonal entity like BSNL cannot add on!
Not, when I do not wish.
It was an envelope from BSNL (Bharat Sanchar Nigam Limited – telephone service provider under control of Government of India.). I pay my telephone bills (both landline and mobile) through ECS (Electronic Clearing System) – I get the bill every month and the amount is directly paid through my bank account. Therefore, I was wondering what this envelop might contain.
To my surprise, there was a letter with a SIM card. This ‘Add on’ SIM is free and there will be no monthly fixed charges. The letter explains briefly the benefits of this ‘Absolutely Free’ facility. The BSNL has spent millions of rupees on dispatch of these SIM cards to its customers.
The problem is I do not need any additional SIM, nor did I ever ask for it. Why the BSNL just could not check it with me in advance? They keep on sending me innumerable SMS regarding this ring tone, that song and that scheme. Why nobody at BSNL thought of confirming the need before spending? After all its public money, they are spending and so they need not bother about such simple aspects of work.
BSNL is not completely at fault though. In the consumerist atmosphere, hardly anybody says ‘no’ to free things. People keep on collecting unwanted things just because they get it free – that only means they do not have to pay direct costs. Why one should keep ‘adding on’ things in life at the wish of others – is the aspect, which I have hardly ever understood.
Normally, I would go to BSNL office and return the SIM card. However, I know, there would be complicated procedure. The idea again is ‘keeping the SIM should be easier’ (saving time, money, energy, mental peace…..) than ‘rejecting this ‘add on’ SIM facility’. This is ridiculous. This may be aggressive marketing but it is irritating enough.
I am neither going to follow BSNL nor will I try to ‘teach them how to work better’. I have decided not to add on anything in life just because some service provider wrongly anticipated my needs. I will add on things if I wish, no one can compel me to do so. Definitely, impersonal entity like BSNL cannot add on!
Not, when I do not wish.
Wednesday, January 21, 2009
23. New Vision
I lost my spectacles on train. For a week, I was out of the city. I was amongst people who could ‘read for me’ whenever required. In addition, I was mostly using laptop for reading and writing, and I found that I could manage life without a spectacle very comfortably.
I had the old prescription with me. However, I took this opportunity to visit Ophthalmologist. He has a very busy schedule. Meeting him by appointment saves time and energy. So, fixing an appointment. The doc was away from the city, so I had to wait for 10 days. It was ok, because I was mostly in the office, and reading on computer was not much of a problem. I could not read papers, books and magazines well, but then I can always live without them.
I had a good fortnight. After coming home in the evenings, relaxed, thought of different things – I mostly tend to think of pleasant things – so was always smiling. Listened to music, listened to yoganidra audio cassette before going to bed, did some cleaning, chatted with neighbors, called plumber and electrician and a whole lot of home maintenance.
I went through routine check up. The assistant doctor told me that earlier I had a ‘short (near) vision’ problem, now it seems that I have developed ‘long (distant) vision’ problem too. Earlier my spectacle was only for ‘near work’ now it has to ‘bi-focal’. To assure me he said, “With the increasing age, vision is lost, it is very normal.” Obviously, he is young and is used to pronouncing the sentence at least 25 times in a day.
Oops….. I was always bad at ‘seeing’ things, which were near; age has nothing to do with loss of this faculty. I was born with that. But I always had the capacity (so I believe) to look beyond, to interpret subtleties, to dream for world which I was not given as birth right. I struggled in the process, but what a worthy struggle it was!
Now it seems that I will not be able to look beyond a certain range and the power will keep on decreasing. As it is I am not used to look at things nearby, and even that power is diminishing. So, what will I be looking at, now onwards? More importantly, what will be I looking for in the remaining life?
How funny it is that with growing age, one looses vision. One needs all sorts of external aid to ‘see’ around. Earlier due to rush of life, there was no time to ‘see’ things, now there is time but I cannot see much. (Of course, I am exaggerating!! I am talking about spectacles that every person needs after crossing 40....... So, don’t you worry......)
May be, it means only youth can envisage.
May be, it means that it is time that I spend all my energy in looking ‘inside’ – to look within.
Today, I finally have my new spectacles.
Then everything became clear. There is no ambiguity, no doubts, and no reservations.
Yes, the life span is limited and there are many things to do.
With external means, some journey could be easily done.
When that too will not be possible, time will tell me what action to take. Why bother right now?
Some new vision may emerge. May be, one kind of loss of vision creates way for another kind of vision. I should be ready to welcome this new vision.....
*
I had the old prescription with me. However, I took this opportunity to visit Ophthalmologist. He has a very busy schedule. Meeting him by appointment saves time and energy. So, fixing an appointment. The doc was away from the city, so I had to wait for 10 days. It was ok, because I was mostly in the office, and reading on computer was not much of a problem. I could not read papers, books and magazines well, but then I can always live without them.
I had a good fortnight. After coming home in the evenings, relaxed, thought of different things – I mostly tend to think of pleasant things – so was always smiling. Listened to music, listened to yoganidra audio cassette before going to bed, did some cleaning, chatted with neighbors, called plumber and electrician and a whole lot of home maintenance.
I went through routine check up. The assistant doctor told me that earlier I had a ‘short (near) vision’ problem, now it seems that I have developed ‘long (distant) vision’ problem too. Earlier my spectacle was only for ‘near work’ now it has to ‘bi-focal’. To assure me he said, “With the increasing age, vision is lost, it is very normal.” Obviously, he is young and is used to pronouncing the sentence at least 25 times in a day.
Oops….. I was always bad at ‘seeing’ things, which were near; age has nothing to do with loss of this faculty. I was born with that. But I always had the capacity (so I believe) to look beyond, to interpret subtleties, to dream for world which I was not given as birth right. I struggled in the process, but what a worthy struggle it was!
Now it seems that I will not be able to look beyond a certain range and the power will keep on decreasing. As it is I am not used to look at things nearby, and even that power is diminishing. So, what will I be looking at, now onwards? More importantly, what will be I looking for in the remaining life?
How funny it is that with growing age, one looses vision. One needs all sorts of external aid to ‘see’ around. Earlier due to rush of life, there was no time to ‘see’ things, now there is time but I cannot see much. (Of course, I am exaggerating!! I am talking about spectacles that every person needs after crossing 40....... So, don’t you worry......)
May be, it means only youth can envisage.
May be, it means that it is time that I spend all my energy in looking ‘inside’ – to look within.
Today, I finally have my new spectacles.
Then everything became clear. There is no ambiguity, no doubts, and no reservations.
Yes, the life span is limited and there are many things to do.
With external means, some journey could be easily done.
When that too will not be possible, time will tell me what action to take. Why bother right now?
Some new vision may emerge. May be, one kind of loss of vision creates way for another kind of vision. I should be ready to welcome this new vision.....
*
Thursday, January 15, 2009
22. Love and Care
It is second week of January. This is peak winter in this area. It is just 3.30 in the afternoon but the Sun has already decided to call it a day. The Sun is so pale that for a moment I mistook it for a moon. The bright yellow saraso flowers are silent. Are they meditating on a strategy of facing the chilly breeze? On the background of broken earthen walls, the scene is gloomy.
The breeze makes the winter cold more severe. The night temperature drops down to 1 to 3 degree Celsius and it is accompanied by fog. The Hindi word for fog is more beautiful – it is kohara. The Hindi word brings with it a flavor of mystery whereas fog just reminds me of pollution.
kohara starts encompassing the area as soon as the Sun sets, that is not later than 5.00 in the evening. It remains stationed till 9.00 or sometimes even till 11.00 in the morning.
I am in village Sarai Sultani in Pratapgarh district (Uttar Pradesh). We are a group of 30 people from 6 different states. Ten of us have come here to interact with Self Help Group (SHG) of women - other two groups are visiting two other villages. Actually, as always the organizers had told women to gather very early than the planned time. So, according to them we have reached late. The women waited for us and had gone back to their homes for work. Presently the days are too short to finish the tasks. The President of one of the SHG tells us that if women are late for meeting, they have to pay a fine. She half humorously and half seriously asks us to pay fine for our late arrival.
Within ten minutes, 20 women gather. I just see that the discussion is going on in the right way and desired direction. This is my fourth visit to this particular village. So, I am aware of the struggles of these women and I appreciate the change they have brought into their life and in the village. But I want others to find out the process for themselves. Apart from that, only I have a digital camera – so I am taking snaps.
Suddenly, by the side of the meeting I see this picture. A young man is covering a young buffalo with the help of a gunny bag. ‘What for it is?’ I ask. “Oh! It is very cold in the night outside, just to protect the young buffalo’, the young man answers. Looking at my bewilderment he patiently explains, “We use sweaters, shawls, blankets and jerkins to protect ourselves from cold weather, this animal can’t do it herself, so I am just helping.” It was a very interesting scene. The love and care expressed by the young man for his animal was worth watching, it touched my heart.
After the meeting, there were number of invitations to visit their homes. During the round in the village, I noticed all young animals were protected. See the goat here? She is wearing an old shirt. Some goats were wearing woolen sweaters. All young animals were covered with so colorful clothes, that it reminded me of a kindergarten. A number of children around us were smiling and laughing, I was capturing them in my digicam and showing those snaps to them ... which made them laugh loudly.......women were talking, men were discussing.... someone offered us amla laddu - sweets prepared by processing Indian gooseberry....
There was so much happiness and peace around. And Oh! Such a humane relationship these simple people have with their animals. Felt vary happy to see this love, care and concern and thousands of smiles.... Still carry the happiness with me...
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The breeze makes the winter cold more severe. The night temperature drops down to 1 to 3 degree Celsius and it is accompanied by fog. The Hindi word for fog is more beautiful – it is kohara. The Hindi word brings with it a flavor of mystery whereas fog just reminds me of pollution.
kohara starts encompassing the area as soon as the Sun sets, that is not later than 5.00 in the evening. It remains stationed till 9.00 or sometimes even till 11.00 in the morning.
I am in village Sarai Sultani in Pratapgarh district (Uttar Pradesh). We are a group of 30 people from 6 different states. Ten of us have come here to interact with Self Help Group (SHG) of women - other two groups are visiting two other villages. Actually, as always the organizers had told women to gather very early than the planned time. So, according to them we have reached late. The women waited for us and had gone back to their homes for work. Presently the days are too short to finish the tasks. The President of one of the SHG tells us that if women are late for meeting, they have to pay a fine. She half humorously and half seriously asks us to pay fine for our late arrival.
Within ten minutes, 20 women gather. I just see that the discussion is going on in the right way and desired direction. This is my fourth visit to this particular village. So, I am aware of the struggles of these women and I appreciate the change they have brought into their life and in the village. But I want others to find out the process for themselves. Apart from that, only I have a digital camera – so I am taking snaps.
Suddenly, by the side of the meeting I see this picture. A young man is covering a young buffalo with the help of a gunny bag. ‘What for it is?’ I ask. “Oh! It is very cold in the night outside, just to protect the young buffalo’, the young man answers. Looking at my bewilderment he patiently explains, “We use sweaters, shawls, blankets and jerkins to protect ourselves from cold weather, this animal can’t do it herself, so I am just helping.” It was a very interesting scene. The love and care expressed by the young man for his animal was worth watching, it touched my heart.
After the meeting, there were number of invitations to visit their homes. During the round in the village, I noticed all young animals were protected. See the goat here? She is wearing an old shirt. Some goats were wearing woolen sweaters. All young animals were covered with so colorful clothes, that it reminded me of a kindergarten. A number of children around us were smiling and laughing, I was capturing them in my digicam and showing those snaps to them ... which made them laugh loudly.......women were talking, men were discussing.... someone offered us amla laddu - sweets prepared by processing Indian gooseberry....There was so much happiness and peace around. And Oh! Such a humane relationship these simple people have with their animals. Felt vary happy to see this love, care and concern and thousands of smiles.... Still carry the happiness with me...
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Sunday, January 11, 2009
21. Idlee and Paneer
When my colleague asked me about participating in a conference at Chennai, I gladly accepted the invitation. Chennai never was a destination for me. But it was always a place, which showed me the way to other likable destinations like Kanyakumari, Pondicherry. So, though I do not know much about the city, I have special affinity for Chennai. Now Chennai is different and so do I, but I have memories of Chennai which I relish even today.
I like South Indian food and especially filter coffee. That was one of my agenda for the visit. For dinner, I was expecting curd rice. Instead I had a north Indian meal. I was surprised. The waiters were speaking fluent Hindi. When I went on giving him various options for curd rice, he was amused. He said, “Madam, I am serving you the best of north Indian food. Please, taste it, you will like it.” I am not much fussy regarding food, so I easily gave up.
Next morning, there was a typical breakfast of corn-flex, canned juice, bread and butter, omelet, puri-bhajee…. and above that ness café. I was wondering whether I have come to Chennai or to Delhi. I asked for filter coffee. I did not get it for the next two days. Neither did I get Idlee. I had paneer subjee, with typical north Indian menu. …… . Most of the conference participants were from Tamilnadu, Kerala and Andhra Pradesh. They were not at all complaining; on the contrary they were thoroughly enjoying the food.
The discussion with the waiters and hotel management revealed the fact that the hotel was owned by a man from Patna and all the workers in the hotel were from Patna and Allahabad. I found it very funny. They had picked up Tamil well, and were able to manage with locals. So, in Chennai for two and half days I ate lots of Paneer- as that was present in all food items.
Two months after this episode, I went to Patna. The place I was staying was naturally offering north Indian food. It was not very clean and I did not like the crowd there. I was alone this time and my colleagues did not understand how difficult it is in Patna for a woman to eat alone in a restaurant.
One evening, I was hungry, so went out at about 8.30. Just outside my hotel, I saw a big South Indian Restaurant. It was crowded, but looked clean and decent. I went in and ate food and had one of the best filter coffees. For next three days, I had my breakfast and dinner at the same restaurant. I was in Patna for five days, not only without eating Paneer, but having a treat of south Indian food.
There was a time, when you had to eat locally available food. When in south, I used to consume rice and in north whether I liked or not jilebee and samosa was the staple diet. Each place had its local flavor and eating was a way of cultural assimilation. People took pride in offering local food and you could never get the same taste elsewhere.
With the spread of consumerism and with the impact of globalization, now towns, cities and places have lost their identity. Each city has a MacDonald, Reliance Fresh, Café Coffee Day… and what not. Now all cities look, smell and make you feel alike. I cannot differentiate cities with open eyes… …They have lost their personality.
Paneer in Chennai and Idlee in Patna are symbolic of changing times and lost identities. They underline our craving for ‘other’ - running after those things which we don’t have. It also indicates hurry of forgetting our own treasure. This symbolizes our stubbornness – wherever we go, we carry our world with us, and never look at what could be the other world.
Is it good or not so good – I am not in a position to decide. But I definitely miss Chennai in Chennai and I have to search for Patna in Patna……
*
I like South Indian food and especially filter coffee. That was one of my agenda for the visit. For dinner, I was expecting curd rice. Instead I had a north Indian meal. I was surprised. The waiters were speaking fluent Hindi. When I went on giving him various options for curd rice, he was amused. He said, “Madam, I am serving you the best of north Indian food. Please, taste it, you will like it.” I am not much fussy regarding food, so I easily gave up.
Next morning, there was a typical breakfast of corn-flex, canned juice, bread and butter, omelet, puri-bhajee…. and above that ness café. I was wondering whether I have come to Chennai or to Delhi. I asked for filter coffee. I did not get it for the next two days. Neither did I get Idlee. I had paneer subjee, with typical north Indian menu. …… . Most of the conference participants were from Tamilnadu, Kerala and Andhra Pradesh. They were not at all complaining; on the contrary they were thoroughly enjoying the food.
The discussion with the waiters and hotel management revealed the fact that the hotel was owned by a man from Patna and all the workers in the hotel were from Patna and Allahabad. I found it very funny. They had picked up Tamil well, and were able to manage with locals. So, in Chennai for two and half days I ate lots of Paneer- as that was present in all food items.
Two months after this episode, I went to Patna. The place I was staying was naturally offering north Indian food. It was not very clean and I did not like the crowd there. I was alone this time and my colleagues did not understand how difficult it is in Patna for a woman to eat alone in a restaurant.
One evening, I was hungry, so went out at about 8.30. Just outside my hotel, I saw a big South Indian Restaurant. It was crowded, but looked clean and decent. I went in and ate food and had one of the best filter coffees. For next three days, I had my breakfast and dinner at the same restaurant. I was in Patna for five days, not only without eating Paneer, but having a treat of south Indian food.
There was a time, when you had to eat locally available food. When in south, I used to consume rice and in north whether I liked or not jilebee and samosa was the staple diet. Each place had its local flavor and eating was a way of cultural assimilation. People took pride in offering local food and you could never get the same taste elsewhere.
With the spread of consumerism and with the impact of globalization, now towns, cities and places have lost their identity. Each city has a MacDonald, Reliance Fresh, Café Coffee Day… and what not. Now all cities look, smell and make you feel alike. I cannot differentiate cities with open eyes… …They have lost their personality.
Paneer in Chennai and Idlee in Patna are symbolic of changing times and lost identities. They underline our craving for ‘other’ - running after those things which we don’t have. It also indicates hurry of forgetting our own treasure. This symbolizes our stubbornness – wherever we go, we carry our world with us, and never look at what could be the other world.
Is it good or not so good – I am not in a position to decide. But I definitely miss Chennai in Chennai and I have to search for Patna in Patna……
*
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